Tales from the Brain Pan

The Scattered Thoughts of an Infected Survivor

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Bizzarre Harry Potter Headcanon:

A wizarding person, most likely in their mid to late teens, carefully lays out a complex series of spells and wards so they can masturbate in their room without any family members hearing them or barging in. Satisfied with their work, they go about their favorite masturbatory practices, explorative and preferred, until they’re fully sated. They fall back into their bed breathing heavily, sweating, huge smile on their face.

And then realize they forgot to cover the wizarding portrait of their deceased grandmother hanging on the wall.

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incredulousbeliever:

dionthesocialist:

It’s hilarious that non-Americans on Tumblr are all like “OMG DENNY’S TUMBLR MAKES ME WISH I LIVED IN AMERICA SO I COULD EAT THERE,” while us Americans will literally only eat at Dennys if it’s 3 in the morning and we’ve lost control of our life.

You don’t go to Denny’s. You end up at Denny’s.

Unless they’re serving The Hobbit menus. Then you take time out of your day, make plans, and meet up with friends at Denny’s.

(Source: dion-thesocialist, via rum-tiger)

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Slowly making progress toward adulthood.

Today’s step:

Put the laundry away instead of throwing the basket in the floor and going to sleep.

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I got my steampoweredgiraffe collectors edition box! I would say more, but the shirt pretty much said it already.

I hope I got the shirt readable. The curvature of my chest made it difficult.

I got my steampoweredgiraffe collectors edition box! I would say more, but the shirt pretty much said it already.

I hope I got the shirt readable. The curvature of my chest made it difficult.